The Music Must Change

Imagine a radio station that plays the same song over and over–(I don’t mean the way FM radio is now where you hear the same songs over and over.)  I mean 1 song repeating and repeating and repeating.  Imagine that song being a steady diet of thoughts/feelings of guilt, shame, remorse and self-loathing(GSRSL).  Imagine the endless supply of obsessive thinking and compulsive replays of the thing(s) you did to create or activate these thoughts.  Yes it’s time to change the station–the music must change!!!

People get involved in all kinds of self-defeating/self destructive behaviors.  There are numerous reasons for this–the top ones that I see are:  addictive disorders/mood disorders/self-sabotaging behavioral and personality traits.  The GSRSL may begin before, during, or after the behavior.  The more of the GSRSL, the greater the need for the behavior, the greater the GSRSL etc.  For example– lets says I decide to  smoke a joint.  Afterwards, I feel a lot of GSRSL.  So what do I do?–exactly, smoke another joint, only to feel more GSRSL–isn’t this just a great way to spend an afternoon?!!!    If you want to complicate this example a little, imagine if I had an addictive disorder, knew that it went against all my teachings to smoke the joint, and then smoked it anyway–I would have the trifecta GSRSL of before, during and after-The music must definitely change!!!!

But how does a person change this music? It’s easy to change a radio station, but something this ingrained, obsessive & compulsive is much harder.  Part of stopping this music is recognizing:  1) this is going to be hard to do  2) that I have been doing this for a while, and 3)its going to take some time to stop it.   The key word that descirbes this is permission –  I have to give myself permission to take the time it’s going to take to make this major change.  I’m also going to need to use a variety of approaches to change this thought and this feeling–(i.e. thought stopping, disputing irrational beliefs, identifying affirmations and using them regularly, and finding gratitude despite the pain).   Using this total package will be a first step in a long process of turning down the music of the GSRSL and moving to something considerably better.  I may need to also speak to a therapist to examine why I do these behaviors and what they are “wired” to.  If in fact there is something biologically based, there may be a need for medication to “tune” these thoughts/feelings into healthier ones.  Yes the music can change and although this change is possible its going to take a lot time and hard work. 

One Response to “The Music Must Change”

  1. johnwhite Says:

    My mind is like my heart. Both of them are beating all the time. It’s impossible to stop these thoughts. I tried many times to stop thinking at all. There is always something to think about. There is always something prevent me from sleeping. In fact there is nothing really happened to make me feel like that. There is nothing really happened to make me think about. So, I find myself fighting unseen enemies.

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